Over the years I have admired those relationships marked by the 40th or 50th or 60th anniversary. What I have also noticed are the one’s that don’t go that far. Why?
The Same Page. Most of the lengthy and/or successful relationships that I have met over many years are 2 people that are on the same page. Focused and visioned in the same direction, they are on the same ship.
The most complicated element in relationships that I have seen are the people going in separate directions. They have separate careers, surrounded by separate times of day. Each of their lives becomes personal spaces and the push me pull you of daily living begins to wear thin. In reality, the focus becomes fuzzy, or becomes competitive or the personal focus and vision disappears. Instead of complimenting each other, they compete with one another.
It is possible that 24-7 for most people, in today’s age of variety and demands, has become a difficult norm. For a person to achieve their personal goals and dreams that they have grown up with throughout their life, attaching themselves to someone else’s dreams and visions can become more confining than rewarding. We no longer live in an age when only one needs to work to achieve grand living. We live in an age that has simpler choices if you choose, or the ability of it’s accomplishments to accommodate a separate set of desires. Many are choosing simpler.
The new paradigm, I feel, is becoming more acquaintence-ship than marriage-ship. People have more ability than ever to follow and pursue their own dreams and goals, and the age old status of my friends at school may simply become my friends in life. I was never attached to just one classmate. Each setting accommodated a different set of people or person. Not a life partner, but a whole group of life’s friends. Rather than separating from life’s friends as a result of marriage, movement, divorce, etc., a person will grow through life developing life friends that they are periodically in touch with, visit, share vacation space, etc. as the norm rather than the exception. (Social Media name here)
The big move of personal growth doesn’t vacate the space that was built in the past like it did 50 years ago. The reunion of veterans is a classic example of what today’s technology develops in this new paradigm of life relationships. Dating becomes more a part of casual living, not going out to dinner because the pace of life is too complicated to make it at home. I see more of that. I see where the measure of control, when not physically established through the relationship parameters of marriage or 24-7 partnership, is expanding the circles of millions of people. Ownership of your life is not held by others, but is shared by others.
I am sure you all have seen it. It will be most interesting to see how it all plays out over the future decades of our new technology centered relationships. How will it affect our choices of housing, automobiles, child options, etc from an early age as planning as opposed to being reactive to life events when we get older? Rather than these choices being made to accommodate a couple, will they be made to better accommodate a future. I also realize that these choices have been made by millions over all of the years as a result of circumstance. Perhaps this is more all about nothing. It will be interesting to see how the future generations develop. I know my grandmother would be shaking her head were she here today and I will no doubt be shaking mine tomorrow.
And a quick note, BTW: The small hand held computers we now text communicate with, are also telephones. You can actually talk to other humans with them.
Watch for more to come.
Have a great day.
Dennis